LOL @ Zedas

-Ezra
On Feb 3, 2006, at 5:42 PM, Zed Shaw wrote:

> Hey,
>
> I've been watching some of the perma-threads on ruby-talk and I  
> really think we need to establish some new mailing lists to handle  
> the various constant subjects that come up.  I'm sure this list is  
> nowhere near complete, but here's what I thought up:
>
> * ruby-jobs --  We should make it even harder for people with money  
> to find people with skills.  I know my book collection is rivaling  
> the Imelda Marcos shoe collection, so making it easier for me to  
> buy more books is dangerous.  Head hunters should be relegated to  
> the ruby-doesnt-need-you mailing list, but don't tell them their e- 
> mail is going there.  They like telling their customers, "You  
> should reconsider using Ruby since I can't seem to find anyone to  
> fill your position."
>
> * ruby-whynot -- Every person has an opinion so why not just air it  
> out like a stinking possum carcass?  This could cover a lot of  
> ground.  Topics like, "Why not Python?", "Why not Ruby::Inline?",  
> "Why not Nitro?", "Why not Rails Engines?"  "Why not Macs?"  "Why  
> not Intel?"  "Why not a virtual machine?"  "Why not Java?"  "Why  
> not Sailor Moon styled bura-sera?"  The potential is endless for  
> this list.
>
> * ruby-sellouts -- I personally got no problem whoring myself out  
> to any company that pays my speaker's fee, but some other folks  
> might need a place to confess their sins.  This list would have to  
> be anonymous so that the posters could confess and not have their  
> confessions ruin their thriving Web 2.0 Ajax Tagging Todo List  
> Ferrari Payment Machines.  Extra points if you can say one thing in  
> your blog to pimp your goods, and then in private insult your  
> customers.
>
> * ruby-rails-sheep -- No, not a place for former Java sheep to come  
> and turn their brains off again, but rather a place for people to  
> discuss the constant topic of table pluralization.  Is it a  
> violation of all laws of nature?  Is it overhead for minimal  
> benefit?  Is it a great way to show users ER diagrams?  This is the  
> place to chat it all up.
>
> * ruby-performance-haters -- Ruby's speed is the white elephant in  
> the room.  We all know it's there, sitting in the room knocking the  
> good china on the damn floor, but we just can't talk about it  
> because if we do we'll have to actually clean up the damn thing's  
> giant piles of crap.  Let's blow the doors off this myth once and  
> for all by creating a list solely devoted to just complaining about  
> Ruby's speed without doing much.  Even better, let's propose every  
> solution *except* writing a new virtual machine.
>
> * ruby-only -- Some people can't stand any deviation from the  
> approved topics.  Step outside the incredibly narrow vision their  
> obsessive compulsive brains have for the list and WHAM!  No IRC for  
> you!  The ruby-only list is for them.  It would only allow messages  
> which are valid Ruby source with no deviation.  If it isn't able to  
> run in a special protected environment that has only core  
> libraries--or has any comments--then it's immediately removed.   
> Nobody wants to waste their time on fluff crap like making friends,  
> building community, having fun, or discovering new ideas from off  
> topic discussions.  Nope, it's Ruby only 24/7.
>
> * ruby-smartass -- This list would basically just be me mouthing  
> off to people who end up doing better than me and make me jealous.   
> I'd write scathing reviews of their projects and insult them all  
> since I don't like people anyway.  I mean, I only donate my  
> software to people so that I can spread bugs.  Anyway, I'm smarter  
> and sexier than the whole world so I need my own mailing list.
>
>
> If you haven't figured it out, this is a joke.  Laugh, have a great  
> weekend, and don't take things so seriously.
>
> Zed A. Shaw
> http://www.zedshaw.com/
>